One of the things that can hinder our efforts more than almost anything else is doubt. When we doubt that we can change our situation, when we doubt whether our wives will do their part, when we doubt that we are capable of staying committed to these efforts, we invalidate the love that gave us the desire to make the changes that will help to facilitate a better marriage.
Kahlil Gibran reminds us that, “Love and doubt have never been on speaking terms.” What that means is where doubt exists, love cannot flourish. Where love is strong, doubt has no power, no ability to wreak havoc.
Although I am absolutely convinced that love is a much more powerful emotion or feeling, doubt appears to be more common and easy to make friends with. When we are tired, when we are beaten down, when we are at our weakest point, it is difficult to love. Love takes an effort on our part. While doubt is made stronger at these times. And it takes no effort at all. It does not even require that we be conscious of it to gain its stronghold. I think it is actually most able to exist when we are weak.
That being said, doubt has not the strength to invade our lives if we choose to stand against it. If we make a conscious decision to ignore the doubts that come to us, if we decide to kill those doubts when they first appear, and replace them with love, commitment to our cause, and a plan to change, doubt will find no place to reside in us.
It is my hope that you will begin to recognize doubt for what it is. That you will see it for the pain and suffering it is responsible for. And that you will stand strong against it. To do this, all you have to do is say no. I will not doubt. I will set my sights and goals on a strong marriage and do the things that will move it towards that end. I will not be deterred by doubting myself and the progress being made. I will focus on the finish line, not the bumps in the road that takes me there.